Good Grief

The death of public figures, particularly those who represent certain social structures, can draw out a range of reactions from the online public, not all of which are solemn. On December 4th, 2024, Brian Thompson, the CEO of healthcare insurance provider UnitedHealthcare, was fatally shot in Midtown Manhattan. Shortly after, a TikTok video expressing the sentiment that no one should “snitch” on the shooter posted a generic photo of the Manhattan Bridge, overlaid with a meme of a man saying, “POV – everyone in Manhattan this morning: ‘oh, oh no, I ain’t seen nothing…matter of fact, I’m blind in my left eye and 43% blind in my right eye…A matter of fact, I can’t even see you, sir,’” gained over 2 million views and 350k likes. 1Most comments also emphasized that they had no sympathy for police efforts to locate the shooter. Many, but not all, were intended to be humorous in tone, expressing sentiments such as: “thoughts and premiums”, “I actually didn’t see anything because my insurance doesn’t cover glasses”, “my empathy is out of network”, “do Aetna next”. This is not the first time online posters have been less than grief-stricken over a well-reported death of someone representing a powerful social institution. When Queen Elizabeth II passed away in September 2022, one X user joked in response to another post asking for more decorous behavior: “Please be respectful when talking about the Queen. She was a head of state, a monarch, a mother to multiple pedophiles and most importantly a devoted cousin to her husband”. In June 22023, a submersible called the Titan imploded on an expedition to the wreckage of the Titanic with the submersible company founder, a technician, and three tourists who paid $250,000 each for their tickets on board. One of the top liked comments on a TikTok video compiling 13 funny memes about the event set to a recorder badly playing a cover of “My Heart Will Go On”, soundtrack of the 1997 movie Titanic was: “They didn’t pay the extra 250k for a return ticket”. 3 There are people who believe that this kind of reaction is never acceptable because it is highly disrespectful to speak ill of the dead. Regardless of what that person may have done in life or what they represent, they are no longer able to defend themselves from anything negative said about them, making it inappropriate to criticize them when they cannot respond. We also may owe the dead a certain level of respect, especially when they died under violent or otherwise extraordinary circumstances. Moreover, these people have family and friends who are already grieving their deaths. Seeing people online reacting this way to the passing of their loved one might exacerbate their emotional distress during a difficult time. However, other people question why death makes people beyond reproach, especially if that person victimized others and upheld harmful social structures in life. Individuals might forfeit their right to respect after death if they, while alive, showed no respect for the lives of others. For the social media users posting such content, Brian Thompson represents corporate greed and healthcare inequality that causes deaths due to denied healthcare coverage. Queen Elizabeth II was the figurehead of a historically violent and colonizing empire. And the millionaires on the Titan submersible represent the wealth hoarding that contributes to worsening wealth disparity in the United States. The divided public reactions to these deaths sparked conversations about such topics as wealth disparity, corporate greed, healthcare inequity, and that may not have happened if internet users all adhered to the “don’t speak ill of the dead” principle.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

1.Do we have an obligation to never speak ill of the dead, no matter what? Why, or why not?

2.Is it ever permissible to make light of or celebrate someone’s death? Why, or why not? When someone dies, is it appropriate to use their death to discuss social issues? If so, what is the most productive way to do so? If not, why not?